Guess Who’s On YouTube?!

Did you say me ?

Well you are right! And I am so stoked! I have been wanting to be on YouTube for forever and yesterday I finally decided to get up off my butt and make it happen. I know don’t know why I’ve been putting it off and making excuses for why I hadn’t started it yet; I’m sure fear played a big part. But with this move coming up and me about to quit my job I’ve decided that now was as best time as any. These days I am truly taking this quote I read to heart and ” responding to any call that excites my spirit !”

Over are the days where I allow myself to fall into the monotony of daily routines and squander my passion and desire to create when inspiration hits. So more about this YouTube channel! I decided I wanted to do something different than what I am use to viewing on YouTube ( makeup  hair, fashion ) and what’s more unique than my story?! A 24 year old virgin abstaining until marriage in the 21st century trying to date?! I sure haven’t heard that anywhere else! And so the birth of “Single In The City”: A Guide to Dating for Virgins. I’ll be vlogging about my experiences dating and trying to find love in this new age of “microwave relationships.” I will also be sharing stories and advice ( for my fellow v-card holders) and some poetry that I have written on this journey. I pray you all join me for this ride! I will still be maintaining both of my blogs so there’s no worry there  🙂 I am so excited to start this channel and start sharing my story! Just Talk, Ill Listen was started out of the need to talk out my problems and feel like someone was listening and for me to do the same in return. Well my YouTube channel is going to do the same thing except I’ll be diving  further into the personal side of my life in hopes that my experiences and my lessons can help someone else. If I can make at least one person feel like they aren’t the only one, then I am happy.

Check me out 🙂

As always, thanks for listening<3

-Taj

30 Day Writing Challenge: Day 22

Day 22: Free-write 

Today I’ve decided to ditch the scheduled writing post ( it sucked, trust me) and do a free-write. Thank God for creative license ! Ha!

I’ve always had the dream to publish my own book by the age of 21. I’m 24. So clearly something went wrong . Or did it? I am a big believer that everything happens for a reason ; even when you don’t understand what that is. I’m not sure whether I got busy or afraid that no one would read it but somewhere along the line I stopped dreaming that dream. But here I am years later ready to pick it back up. I feel like at 24 I have much more to say than what I would have back then. I feel like I’m really ready now ! I already have three book ideas and I am so excited to try and bring them to life. Until I’ve really decided on the titles and cover art that part shall have to be a secret , but I promise to impress ! I have an idea to do one poetry book and the other based on my struggles as 21st century virgin. I won’t give a deadline just yet , for fear of rushing it, but I do foresee it being rather soon! I pray that you all support me in this journey 🙂 

As always , thanks for listening ❤

-Taj

30 Day Challenge: Day Seven

Day Seven: What tattoos do you have and if they have meaning

Come on I’m a poet , does anything I do NOT have meaning?! Ha-ha, but no, seriously.

I have three tattoos right now and yes they all have meaning.

Tattoo #1 : Circa 2011

This tattoo is one of the more simple ones I have , but it holds a lot of sentiment because it forever solidified the bromance between me and my cousin Nebbie. We got a pretty cheap inexpensive African symbol on the inside of our left ankles. I’ll post it below & it’s meaning. Although the meaning of the symbol resonated with us both, I was more happy to have a matching tattoo with one of my favorite people in the world! Our bond is forever, just like our tattoos. (I know that’s corny, but leave me be ha-ha)

Sankofa is a word in the Akan language of Ghana that translates as “reach back and get it” (san – to return; ko – to go; fa – to fetch, to seek and take) and also refers to the Asante Adinkra symbol represented either by a bird with its head turned backwards taking an egg off its back, or as a stylised heart shape.

Tattoo #2 & #3: Circa 2013

I cannot believe I don’t have any pictures of these two tattoos!! I’m so upset. I’ve been like 3 different iphones and they all have some of the best pictures on them that I will never ever get back * goes into mini depression* Curse me for never backing up my phone !

Both of these tattoos were done in one sitting and equally hold space in my heart. I drew both of them myself and I am pretty proud of how they turned out.

I have one on my chest , strategically placed right over my heart, that says “True Love Waits.” Anyone who has followed my blog knows that I am a virgin waiting until marriage for sex , but what you all don’t know, is how close I was to go back on this vow. Not because I was in love or anything of real importance, but because I was tired of waiting and temptation is a female dog! Close call. The actual tattoo is a heart with a lock and a ring as the key, clearly the ring being more symbolic than anything, but who doesn’t want the ring?! And underneath the heart is the promise that I’ve made to myself and a much needed reminder to myself, TRUE LOVE WAITS. So the next time my shirt comes off, I’ll have my handy dandy , reminder!

My last tattoo is on my back , on the opposite side of the other tattoo, and is a very large butterfly with a teal blue cancer ribbon in the middle of it and underneath in cursive is the ever so true title, “Mommy’s Girl.” My mommy loves butterflies and she’s a cervical cancer survivor. I’ve almost lost my mother twice, once to cancer and another to her own demons, but she’s still here. And I’ll forever thank God for that. Because this girl does not know how to live in a world without her mother. And she better not ever make me.

As always, thanks for listening,

Taj

Let Me Explain

I’ve been posting quite a bit lately about my views on love and marriage and I feel like I should explain why I have some of these thoughts or at least try. I am very vocal about my desire to abstain from sex until marriage, I always have been. Being a virgin at the age of 22 is something I am very proud of . My only fear is that sometimes I can come off as “preachy” or judgemental or seem arrogant as if to say I am better than anyone else ;that has never been my intention. My confidence in my choice to wait comes from a very personal place and I don’t seek to discourage anyone from what they think is right for them. My main reason for being so open about my vow is so that those around me may have an understanding as to why I say or do the things I do , especially for men who seek to pursue me as a potential partner. The last thing I want is to lead someone on and promise things I can’t and will not deliver on. And let me tell you, it hasn’t been easy. At times it has been downright frustrating and discouraging. I can’t begin to explain the sting that rejection brings especially when it’s at the hands of a man who has such little respect for you that he feels entitled to your body after one conversation ; who looks at your vow to wait as a challenge to take on. It hurts .But I digress. The only thing I can do is hold fast to what I believe in having faith that love is stronger than lust and that any man meant to be in my life will honor me and my decision. Not seek to change or amend it. And should I, as a result of a lapse of judgement or moment of weakness, choose to go back on this vow I pray that it will be with a man who loves me enough to steer me back on course. I don’t expect everyone to understand it, hell, sometimes I don’t ,but I can ask that you respect it. I think my biggest fear is that no one will find me worth the wait. That I’ll give in, not because I want to, but because it’s the only option I have. I’m not ignorant, I know that sex is an important part of a romantic relationship , and please do not confuse my inexperience as admittance to the popular theory about virgins (albeit it false in most cases) that we are uninterested in it. I have the same needs and desires if not stronger since I have chosen to not act upon them. I too crave someone to keep me warm at night, but for me , it’s just not worth the risk. Do I think it’s selfish? Holding out? Expecting someone to just give if up for me? I guess from the outside in ,it could look that way, but I believe there is so much more to learn about a person before you become intimate and that it becomes increasingly hard to do when you add sex to the mix. Now, that’s not to say it can’t be done, I just believe that it will be easier for me without the distractions. I know God has someone just for me and when I meet him I’ll understand why it never worked with anyone before him . The way I see it, what greater gift to give my husband on our wedding night than the whole of me, mind body and soul ; completely untainted by anyone else’s hands. Now that’s love.