I wrote up my two weeks notice today. I’ve been at my job for almost eight years and honestly I am scared to death.
What if I made the wrong decision? What if I can’t find another job? What will I do then?
But if I am being totally honest I think I am way more scared of this question
What if I never leave?
Although nursing is what I thought I wanted to do, 4 years into this job I knew that I was wrong; still I stayed. Why? I was comfortable and content, I rationalized that couldn’t find another job to pay me what I’m making now. And that’s one of the reasons I know it’s time for me to say goodbye. I never wanted to be the woman who loathed going to work everyday , the woman who felt stuck and tired of being tired. That’s my everyday now. I have no creative freedom and all my gifts and talent lay dormant as I chase an old dream that no longer holds any value. I have so many goals and aspirations and none of them involve the nursing field. I will say that I am thankful for the opportunity to have been apart of something bigger than myself and to be able to work everyday knowing that I am making a difference; no greater feeling. But I made a promise to myself to stop when it no longer served its purpose in my life and I feel like I broke that promise to myself some time ago. And now I am being a woman of my word. I won’t forget the experience and the memories of my first and only nursing job, straight out of high school and wet behind the ears. I am a big believer that being “faithful over few, will make you ruler over many” and for that I have to catch myself sometimes when I am complaining and be reminded that at one point this was something I wanted. I will miss my residents and my staff workers that I have built a bond with. Now I have to pray for the courage to actually hand it in. I know that leaving is a big leap that I am taking out of my comfort zone, but it is very necessary. It has been a long time coming and I ask for your thoughts and prayers during this time of transition. It’s goodbye to a large part of who I am today and that is not easy at all for me. It’s the beginning of an end. But you know what they say . . .
“If you’re brave enough to say goodbye, life will reward you with a new hello.” – Paul Coelho
I sure hope they’re right.
As always , thanks for listening<3